A Page From My Diary…

We had that talk.  You know the one… “Why don’t you respect my time,” “I feel unappreciated,” “you don’t listen to me,” “You never touch me anymore,” “I feel alone.”  It’s the kind of talk that rips your heart in two at the sound of your own words and your lover’s words.  As you look at each other, you can feel the sting of pain and resentment. I breathe silently… {how did we get here}.

I’ll tell you how we got there. We neglected our housekeeping. We’ve let the stress of our jobs, school, elderly parent care and house renovation cloud up our thoughtfulness and kindness towards each other.  It starts so slow you barely notice it… a stinging remark that turns into a fight one night. Avoidance over breakfast. Sitting across the room from each other. Not holding hands.

The inertia of that first biting remark can engulf a great relationship in the blink of an eye. If you let it.  Communication between two people is as much about body language as it is about the spoken word.  We stopped looking each other in the eyes and saying “thank you” and “I appreciate you.”  Those are a couple of tiny words that go a long way.

Sometimes you have to step back and remember why you are doing it all.  All the hard work is for your present as much as your future.  As the cliche goes, “the grass grows where you water it.”


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